The Respect Factor

I'm been thinking an awful lot about our neighborhood trying understand the various issues that seem to be nipping away at our solidarity.  One of our Uplanders send me such a thought provoking email that I am finally beginning to suspect that the situation isn’t about individual issues, such cars parked in the driveways, the lack of lights on Zanzibar, the use of bright lights that are triggered by motion shining into people’s homes, the dog poop that isn't picked up, the blocked sidewalks, the loud music played in such a way that it bothers the neighbors, the riding of bikes off-road in the common areas of the preserve, speeding cars that don’t stop at the intersections, hunting in the preserve, etc.  While each one of those issues warrants an actual discussion (not just dismissal), I believe there is a deeper, underlying problem.  I suspect the problem is tied a general feeling that mutual respect is lacking.  I’ll refer to this as the “respect” factor.

I’d like to reduce the feelings of “us vs. them” that associated with the various issues identified above. I am hoping that eventually we can work together to come to some compromises that may not please everybody, but which will at least put us on the same, unified page. 

Yes, I’m an optimist, but I’m also driven by what I’ve seen can happen when a neighborhood fractures and unity starts to disintegrate.  What do I mean? In my experience I’ve witnessed increased bickering, theft, graffiti, and violence resulting in a loss of property values. Some neighbors became overtly abusive to others.  The neighborhood became very unattractive, with more littering, less up-keep of the homes, and more loitering and an influx of drugs.  I don’t expect that level of deterioration to happen here, but we are starting to see graffiti.  We have had thefts and attempts to break into homes. We have had what can only be called abusive interactions between neighbors. People are shooting firearms in the preserve, although I don’t believe they live in our area. Maybe these incidents are what concern me about the direction I see the neighborhood going. 

I’m also driven by what can happen when disengaged people once again claim their neighborhood, start communicating and banding together to address issues, and rebuild what they once valued in the area in which they lived. I believe we live in a very special community. Nearly everyone I’ve met has worked hard to get here.  Nearly everyone I’ve met has a good heart, is warm and caring.  I think our neighborhood can do better at reflecting that warmth if we rebuild respect and trust.

As a start, I’d like to hear your thoughts on the following in order to be sure I’m chasing the right problem.

1.    Are issues being raised but never fully discussed, so that people understand the reasons behind decisions? 

2.    Is there a feeling of favoritism? 

3.    Do you feel respected by your neighbors?

4.    Do you feel you are provided the information you need?

5.    Do you feel you are being treated fairly?

Since some of these issues are really sensitive, I encourage you to simply email me your responses. Le me know if I can put them on the blog anonymously or for attribution.

Regardless of whether I am elected to the Board, I am committed to this neighborhood. I’m not being noble. My motives are actually quite selfish.  I want to continue loving the area in which we have moved.  I see too many of my neighbors who no longer feel the same.